I’m home sick today but I have a date tonight. I’m keeping my fingers crossed I don’t have to cancel.
Sitting in bed under the covers with a cup of tea and some saltines gives me an opportunity to figure out what to wear. I have this ongoing date outfit dilemma though.
Sitting in bed under the covers with a cup of tea and some saltines gives me an opportunity to figure out what to wear. I have this ongoing date outfit dilemma though.
To Spanx or not to Spanx.
Lord knows I work to get the damn things on. Nothing like wiggling into a nylon cotton and spandex tube- writhing around the room pulling and tugging, shifting and checking for “issues” and bunching (FYI I did try this once with heals on- got a stiletto caught in the leg of the nylon tripped over the shoe box and almost knocked myself out on my bed post- I had visions of the Roommate finding me collapsed on the floor, spanx twisted to the point where it would have to be cut off to prevent the loss of circulation to my feet). Then after strapping on the right bra I check the mirror to see if I look ok (not with the dress on yet mind you). I squint a bit and I can at least get the idea of the shape but I’ve learned avoid getting a close and clear look at myself because Spanx and a bra is NOT attractive- I don’t care how fantastic the heals are. The dress goes on after and although one might think this would be the end of it, it isn’t- I start the movement test. Fast spin, bend over, sit down, reach up, smooth over all just to see if the damn thing can be seen, felt or yes even heard. Then, and only then do I step back, really look at myself and find I’m mildly disappointed. I haven’t become Kate Winslet but at least I’m lump free.
Is it cheating? Like busting out the push-up water bra or padded butt jeans? Maybe.
I choose to believe it’s more like a good make up application… mixed with a workout.
Is it cheating? Like busting out the push-up water bra or padded butt jeans? Maybe.
I choose to believe it’s more like a good make up application… mixed with a workout.
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You are very funny and talented writer! Since you are shapewear girl,you should check into the Sassybax slimmimg top called the Torso Trim. It does for vbl what Spanx did for vpl in 1998 when Ms. Blakely started her company. The Torso Trim was invented in 2003 by Amanda Horan Kennedy and is the flagship product of her comfortable shapewear line called Sassybax Shapewear. it's sold and Neiman's and Saks but can also be seen online. I can tell you from first hand experience that it is truly comfortable becasue i wear it everyday. I have to confess, i am she.
ReplyDeleteamanda horan kennedy
founder and ceo
sassybax
You are so FUNNY! I am loving your blog. Keep up the good work :)
ReplyDeleteI was laughing so hard I cried when I read this post. I even read it out loud to my friends and had to stop because I couldn't see the page. So true and yes so well written.
ReplyDeleteI laughed so hard I cried when I read your post. This so so true and so well written. I can ACTUALLY imagine you taking yourself out with the heels in the nylons.
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