The Bridget Jones Dilemma

I’m home sick today but I have a date tonight. I’m keeping my fingers crossed I don’t have to cancel.
Sitting in bed under the covers with a cup of tea and some saltines gives me an opportunity to figure out what to wear. I have this ongoing date outfit dilemma though.

To Spanx or not to Spanx.

Lord knows I work to get the damn things on. Nothing like wiggling into a nylon cotton and spandex tube- writhing around the room pulling and tugging, shifting and checking for “issues” and bunching (FYI I did try this once with heals on- got a stiletto caught in the leg of the nylon tripped over the shoe box and almost knocked myself out on my bed post- I had visions of the Roommate finding me collapsed on the floor, spanx twisted to the point where it would have to be cut off to prevent the loss of circulation to my feet). Then after strapping on the right bra I check the mirror to see if I look ok (not with the dress on yet mind you). I squint a bit and I can at least get the idea of the shape but I’ve learned avoid getting a close and clear look at myself because Spanx and a bra is NOT attractive- I don’t care how fantastic the heals are. The dress goes on after and although one might think this would be the end of it, it isn’t- I start the movement test. Fast spin, bend over, sit down, reach up, smooth over all just to see if the damn thing can be seen, felt or yes even heard. Then, and only then do I step back, really look at myself and find I’m mildly disappointed. I haven’t become Kate Winslet but at least I’m lump free.
Is it cheating? Like busting out the push-up water bra or padded butt jeans? Maybe.
I choose to believe it’s more like a good make up application… mixed with a workout.